one night a week, it's all i ask for

I have a plan for writing, and I want to feel hopeful and determined about it. I want it to make a difference. I'm not sure if it will, and that lack of confidence sucks. Why do we go through these cycles? These frenzied delightful periods when it's all about writing, so sure of it, followed by a time of inactivity, doused in guilt. A big hairy fuck off guilt monkey, sitting on our shoulders.

Will this up and down ever end? Will there ever be a time when I will just write, and continue to write?



Here my Latest Plan™: to write every Wednesday night. Wednesday is when I make words. Home from work, inhale food, whirl through shower, and sit down with whirring clunky laptop and just do it.

Schedule it in, like an appointment. Like my 'girls night' every Tuesday with Cara & Lou, like my gym every Monday and Thursday (only, well, more regular than the gym even).

It seems simple, right? It's just one short period of time every week which will be for writing. And of course, I can write any other day as well. Let's see how it goes.

So, I sat down last night to work on Molly / In Finding, and it went well. I haven't added very many new words lately but I have restructured it and I'm pleased with how it flows now. There are a lot of placeholder "write this here" sentences, but that's for the next phase of plugging the gaps!

I need to do some research on Dunkirk, and wartime & post-wartime Britain, to fill in Tom's story.

Hovering around 31.5k words at the moment.